Saying Goodbye to 2022 with Gratitude

January 5, 2023

As we say good-bye to the year 2022, there are many aspects to consider. First, there are the happy moments where we were in joy and can remember events, persons or places with gratitude. In addition, there are moments that weren’t so happy; in fact, they may have been sad, trying or challenging in which we were tested in soul growth. How do we appreciate all of these moments as we leave the past year behind? How to be in gratitude and appreciation for both the good as well as the not so good is the topic of this article.

In order to provide a background for my thoughts, it’s necessary to lay the foundation of my philosophy which essentially comes from years of study both at the Edgar Cayce Institute as well as my Jewish upbringing.  We are first and foremost, souls in a body, not a body with a soul. Why is this different? The body is just a vehicle to allow the soul to learn and grow. It is the soul that comes first. During conception, and when the time is right for the soul to enter the body which may not be at the same time, the soul having made a contract with these two people that become the parents to provide a developmental environment for this entering soul. We have therefore chosen our parents to provide us with this platform on which we can learn the lessons set out for us during a particular lifetime. To dive into a deeper understanding, I refer you to the study of the Kabbalistic Wheel of Gongelah in which each soul gets many chances to achieve perfection throughout multiple lifetimes. One’s good deeds move forward with the slightly more perfected soul after each lifetime.

For the purposes of this article, let’s just assume the nature of the soul in the body. Thus, once we add in free will and lots of chances to “get it right”, we have events that turn out ok and some that just don’t work out the first time, or even the second time. This may pertain to work, health, relationships, finances, etc. This concept relates to all aspects of one’s life.

Looking back over this past year, there are many events and personal interactions which I remember that cover a full spectrum of emotions. Even within one relationship, there were wonderous times and times when I was very upset or felt tested. All of these interactions led to me gaining a better of understanding of myself. Those situations which were challenging required me to sit and think about why it bothered me so much and therefore, what was the lessons that I was supposed to glean from it? Sometimes, I had to journal and really ponder why what seemed like a really nice person initially would suddenly act in anger, be cruel or in some other hostile behavior when I felt that I was being just me. Now here’s the rub. Perhaps there was something that I did to create the situation, or perhaps it was just part of my karma to learn to deal with difficult people. I suspect that the latter was the case.

It’s important to figure out what one’s purpose is in any particular lifetime so that one can judge if a particular event, person or situation was challenging us for the getter or worse. Was that situation helping us to move forward even with all the difficulties? Or was it just another bad choice to be involved at that particular time? I really believe that we are called into interactions not by chance but by divine guidance and always with a reason. We often can’t see the forest for the trees, so we need to sit quietly and figure out what’s going on in order to learn the underlying lesson.

There have been some situations where I was just planning to go out dancing or to visit a town and I bumped into a new person who turned out to be just the one to help me find my way, befriend me for a time or hang out for a while. There are many situations that have happened like this. I was at the Edgar Cayce Institute for a program in October (the Ancient Mysteries Conference) and walked into the snack room during a break to find only one other person in there. We started a conversation and ended up spending the rest of the conference hanging out together. At the end of the program, we went our separate ways. We were meant to interact, chat, and even have dinner together one night to be friends, but just for those couple of days. It was pleasant and I could accept it as such. I have gone to other countries and had people hang out with me just for the program there. In this case it was for the conference.

Another time, I decided to visit Richmond for a dance program. I had always wanted to visit the Virginia Fine Arts Museum and so had the chance to do so on this overnight trip. I saw an interesting exhibit about guitars used to tell stories in paint or other artistic mediums as well as their Art Deco gallery. This particular Friday evening was a special event with a tango lesson, live music trio and some time for tango dancing with local dancers. During this time, I met a man who looked familiar yet we couldn’t recall how we may have met. Was it in this lifetime at another dance when he visited my area or was it feelings from a prior lifetime? In any case, there was that feeling of knowing each other which we both felt and caused an instant attraction which led to much talking and dancing together during the course of the evening. I went back to my hotel feeling quite good regarding all that I had taken in, including my museum visit, the wonderful dinner I had in their restaurant, as well as my dance experience.

The next morning, I began my trip back home which normally took two hours; unfortunately, there was construction as well as an accident-causing serious delays. I then saw a text from my new friend from the night before. As I was still in traffic, driving slowly I decided to call stating how bad the traffic was. He immediately, asked me where I was and it turned out that I was driving right past his exit! As I get very motion sick in traffic, I was looking for a place to pull off, so when he told me to “get off and come to visit”, I decided to do just that. Unexpectedly, I was directly to his home and enjoyed an afternoon until the traffic died down. Was it just coincidence or providence? I do believe that I was divinely guided for what ever reason to spend more time with this man. Nothing really came of it although we did go dancing the following weekend only to find that our lives are headed in different directions. That being said, it was a very nice interlude for the week that we interacted. There is a time and a place for everything and sometimes only a small time that two people meet. We can be grateful for that time that we shared and not be upset that it didn’t work out for more. Should I even be grateful for the traffic since it was the impedance for me to have a lovely afternoon?

There was another not so pleasant situation where a friend pretended to want more in a relationship in order to gain my guidance to learn to dance. When someone is misled and used, the results may seem like the one person gained the upper hand but in reality, they really just gained negative karma. In the end, they will have to pay for what they did. There is pay back for all of our actions, both good and bad. Thus, we have to atone for what we have done to others.

Let’s look at some situations where finances were concerned. Over the last few months I was renovating my kitchen and several hic cups caused unexpected expenses. There was the demotion wherein mice droppings were found that led to my attic being cleaned out. The bad news is that it cost a lot to have the work done but the good news is that I have all new insulation. The contractors left wood in my garage which rubbed one of my tires causing it to tear on the road. I had to have not one tire replaced but all four due to the age of the tires. The bad news is that it cost a lot to replace the tires but the good news is that I have all new tires to drive during the winter. There is a good side to everything where we can be grateful. It has been an expensive year, yet I still can be grateful for each challenging event.

I wish you the best for your year in review and many blessings for the year to come. As always, comments are welcome.


Not Knowing

April 18, 2022

I’m reading a book on Antisemitism that is the total of presentations for a conference of the same subject conducted at the University of Indiana this past Fall (2021). It’s written by Academics for Academics which makes sense since they present to each other. My issue with it is that the language is not easy for me to understand. I’m not putting myself down nor am I criticizing the presenters. When one is in a world, that’s the framework that these people have. But for those outside of this particular scope/perspective, it’s difficult to comprehend. It would be like trying to understand quantum physics without really studying it nor having a background in it.

Antisemitism

Why am I pointing this out? Because in reading this book of articles on Antisemitism, I’m learning all the things that I didn’t know about the subject. I must point out to my readers that I’m Jewish so I definitely know what it’s like to be Jewish and to have some people not like me for just being Jewish. I’ve also experienced people being really mean to me for being Jewish. In other words, I’ve experienced antisemitism without knowing the “definitions” of antisemitism nor understanding the academic framework surrounding the intellectual discussion of it.

Again, why is this important? Because not knowing, and then knowing about it opens a whole new world. Now that I know about all the ways that I was wronged in my life based on my being Jewish without realizing it, should I be even more upset than when the particular incident happened? In most cases, these incidents happened many years ago, but I’m coming to realize that many actions people are doing even more recently is actually because they don’t like my Jewishness; in other words, they are acting in an antisemitic way towards me. Does it make me feel any better or worse in knowing? Or in Not Knowing, being in ignorance of why people were being mean to me was it any better?

An interesting point is that most of the speakers who presented and who do present on antisemitism are not Jewish. So, it’s a conundrum to me how someone who isn’t Jewish and doesn’t have any Jewish blood is so taken with others not liking Jews to actually make it a field of study. Do people wonder about this or is it just me? There are many people all over the US and in other countries in this field of antisemitism that are not Israeli, nor Jewish and study this topic. What is their motivation? I see many names that appear to be Austrian, German, etc. Is there any correlation between the nationalities of the seekers with their reasons for studying such a subject when they are not connected to the situation, nor were they harmed by the subject except in concept. “When one of my fellow humans is wronged then so am I”. That’s pretty egotistical if I don’t say so myself. But I really have no idea why these academics are studying this topic so I can’t presume anything.

As I’ve continued my reading of this book, the answer to my questions is becoming more known to me: the speakers/authors are from countries involved in the holocaust and its aftermath. Again, from my readings I’m learning about how these countries are getting tired of apologizing for their involvement in the harming or not protecting more of their citizens from harm during the WWII destruction of so many Jewish lives.

Of course, people of many religions died during this period but most were killed during war times not just rounded up from their homes and murdered in one way or another. The systematic killing of six million Jews is horrific by any historical standard.

There appears to be a new generation of leaders that want to move away from apologizing and even accepting their past history to now shifting away from blame. In other words, they are attempting to change history. Not only are they re-writing what actually happened, but this new perspective is rationalizing the entire historical period away from their minds. Now it’s been done by “Others” and not “Them” so their people can breathe easier. With this new understanding, I can see why some of the authors are taking a stand on the resultant antisemitism that is arising out of this, well it’s not us, but them at fault. Again, it’s the Jews who are at fault. In other words, antisemitism is more on the rise than ever.

Of course, many people study ancient Roman culture and they have nothing to do with ancient romans. They didn’t live at that time nor are they responsible for anything that happened then but they still study this period in history. So, I guess if people want to study about another group of people and why others hate them, it’s ok.

As for my understanding what it’s like to be Jewish and to totally feel what it’s like to have been persecuted during the war, let me say that most of my relatives were killed during the holocaust. I believe that this point makes me able to say that I feel the pain of the persecution through the fact that I have so little family left. I especially am reminded of this fact on holidays and when people tell me that they’re about to visit cousins or other family members. I do have some family but only because those members of my family that did come over in the early 1900’s have married and had kids and they have had kids so there are a few generations in the US. Unfortunately, anyone that stayed behind is no longer.

As I continue my reading into this fascinating book and my NOT KNOWING becomes MORE KNOWING, I’m learning how more of the same old perspective that got Jews rammed into pogroms in the late 19th century is recurring; in addition, it contributed to the “it’s ok to kill the Jews because they caused all the ills going on in society thinking” is again gaining momentum. This is really news to me so my NOT KNOWING here is blowing my mind. Apparently, people just don’t learn from history. Are we going to have another world war over it? Do we have to have more lives lost like before? Or is this craziness the reason that non-Jews recognize the reason to fight against antisemitism before it’s too late? As this is a huge subject, for now, I’ll leave it as the answer. We all need to use our own minds and not be led like sheep to the slaughter by those that wish to tear down the very fabric of our society – (even with it’s edges and curves!)

Comments or questions are welcome.


Making way for the new (appliances)

June 25, 2020

Normally, when one speaks of letting go of the old to make way for the new, there is something really important at hand – like cleaning out closets or learning a new language to open up brain cells. This is a story of making way for new appliances after well, yes, 22 years. The old ones served me well and I’ve been holding on to them for just that reason. But that little voice inside has been pestering me to change them out in the kitchen for the last few months before my freezer full of meats (due to the meat scare of a few weeks ago causing me to run out and buy more chicken and other meats than I normally would have just like most other people – On occasion, although I try not to be, I can be a product of my environment – guilty as charged!). So I finally started to listen with my search in earnest beginning about 5 weeks ago.

Normally, when one speaks of letting go of the old to make way for the new, there is something really important at hand – like cleaning out closets or learning a new language to open up brain cells. This is a story of making way for new appliances after well, yes, 22 years. The old ones served me well and I’ve been holding on to them for just that reason. But that little voice inside has been pestering me to change them out in the kitchen for the last few months before my freezer full of meats (due to the meat scare of a few weeks ago causing me to run out and buy more chicken and other meats than I normally would have just like most other people – On occasion, although I try not to be, I can be a product of my environment – guilty as charged!). So I finally started to listen with my search in earnest beginning about 5 weeks ago.

The actually story of my search and final selection is captured in a separate article because it involved a few really cool interactions with highly motivated light workers who happened to cross my path. Now for those new here, I don’t believe in just happened – so these people were divinely guided to help me even when I really wasn’t in the mood to listen. Sometimes we are so busy being ourselves that we have to get out of our own way, as the renowned psychic Edgar Cayce used to say, to hear the still small voice inside. I’m sure that some angel assigned to help me sent these people to keep me from making a huge mistake by spending lots of money on the wrong products at the wrong stores. I mean places that wouldn’t support me when things went wrong or products that wouldn’t hold up either. In the end, I do feel that I’ve purchased from a reputable, family owned business in Woodbridge, VA (local to my area of DC) and from a store manager who seems to really care.

Now here’s the point for today. I totally cleaned out the refrigerator. One could ask why would I clean a frig that’s to be given away?  I did call Habitat for Humanity and told them that they could come and get it from me or from the appliance distributor’s place and who wants to have others get a grungy frig? It wasn’t that bad, but really it isn’t nice to give something away that’s dirty. I guess I was just brought up that way. So am I being self-centered to worry about what other’s think over a material item or is there another reason for my actions?

The answer is kind of deep. I feel like I’m saying good-bye to old friends who have served me well. Yes, it’s time to let go of the old and welcome in the new.  Am I concerned about what people will think of me as a housekeeper or am I performing a ritual like burying the dead? I’ve been thinking about it. For real, it wasn’t that dirty, but I feel just like when I gave my other cat a bath after she died but before she was cremated – it’s just respect for a creature that’s served me – in the case of my cat, with love. In the case of my appliances, it has to do with loyalty. And that’s my story. I will say good-bye to my frig, stove and microwave tomorrow. Then I will not only welcome in to the newer version of these same appliances, I will have to learn how to use them.

Comments are always welcome.


If a tree could talk

January 7, 2019

Ever walk by an interesting tree and wonder about it? Old is It? Do animals live in its branches or inside part of its trunk? What stories could it tell you about people that have been walking by. Some trees are called witness trees because they’ve seen horrible events… or maybe two people got engaged under a tree. All of these are possibilities if a tree could tell you what it’s seen or heard.tree

What is precipitating this question for me? Recently there was a tree that fell across the walking path behind my townhome. As I stood looking at this huge brown tree devoid of leaves, essentially dead, it fell across the path, having fallen due to excessive rain, I wondered about its life.

After a heavy rain storm, I decided to get out and take a walk on my to find the path blocked by this fallen tree. For some strange reason I actually felt sorry for the tree, as it had come to the end of its life. Then I thought again. No, perhaps it was the end of its living life but in death it would provide a means of life to other creatures. Does that mean it continues on in another fashion?

Can we say the same thing about our own lives? When we end our physical lives and change our form do we continue on in another fashion and live life in another form ourselves? It might be another version of us; the spiritual version that is eternal just like the tree continues on even when it decays into bits of wood and then into bits of earth. It then becomes elements that give nourishment to plants and other living things.  As we change form do we help other living things to flourish? Does the spirit inside us help others to flourish? I believe we can do so when we become spirit guides also known as guardian angels. This is when our souls choose to help others while we are in spirit form.

Just as this tree will one day provide a place for a nest for birds, a home for squirrels as well as mosquitoes or even other little creatures, we too can help other people thrive once we cross over.


Angels on my Shoulder

December 10, 2018

During my recent trip to Portugal I had several experiences where I felt that synchronicity was at play to the extent that it must be my angels at work helping me. The story I’m going to relate in this article is that of my day trip to the historic town of Sintra, where just when I needed help, it was available to me.

After several attempts to take a group tour on this particular Saturday during my vacation failed, I decided to go it alone. Armed with travel brochures, internet information on the key sights, and information of what not to miss, I left my hotel about 8:30 am with a very positive outlook. I had already mastered the metro system to the point of knowing where the nearest stop was and where to get off, but I didn’t know how to find the connecting train station for the out of town trip to Sintra. Buying the ticket was easy at the ticket booth which was manned with a live person, asking in English is a forte of mine as I don’t speak Portuguese.

angelThe next step was to get off the metro and find the train station. I started to inquire of my fellow metro passengers who either didn’t understand me or didn’t know. This was strange to me since it was with in a short walk of the metro stop. Everything is different when one is in another country and not familiar. On the third try I happened upon a family with an elderly gentleman who seemed to be the local resident and the others, the visitors. In asking this group about the location of the train station, I discovered they were from Poland. I chimed in that my heritage is Polish as my Mother’s father came from Poland in the early 1900s, a town called Silencia. To my surprise, I was told that they came from this same place. I was asking for help from people of my heritage land! As we got off the metro, the elderly gentleman, most likely their father, speaking no English but made to understand my goal from his relatives, pointed the way to the train station. Yes! Mission accomplished!

Having my ticket in hand I quickly found my train on the track already arrived. I barely made it into a seat before the train left so my timing was quite good. As I settled in the seat I had found after searching for one up and down several cars, I noticed French spoken near me.

 In my usual brilliant way, I asked the young woman closest to me “are you from France?” She replied, “yes, we are from Lyon”, referring to the 3 couples in her group. This brief introduction began a conversation about our day in Sintra and planned itineraries. After hearing about the place I wanted to see they changed  their plan and decided to join me. I was thrilled. We all got off the train together and for the next 6 hours became a new unit, wherein I was treated like one of them… something like being an adopted Mom. The young woman had left her 8 month old baby at home for this weekend away with her Mom so perhaps she was in a very nurturing mode.

It turned into a wonderful day for me, where at first I thought I’d be alone I was accompanied by a nice group of friendly people all day while touring interesting sights. We even stopped and had tea together. It was a very warm feeling to chat and interact with these young people for the day. About 3pm we parted company as our desires changed… with me wanting to view the inside of the Pena Palace and their only wanting to see the outside gardens.. We said goodbye with invitations from the young woman to visit Lyon.

About an hour later I walked down the hill, took the bus back to the train station, then the train to the metro and as I was coming up the stairs from the metro station I looked up in amazement… could my eyes be deceiving me? There was the same group of French people looking just as amazed! I knew then that I had been experiencing a divinely inspired day complete with angels on my shoulder to look out for me. How else could I have met the same group back in Lisbon?

Although I had a two week vacation on my own and did some organized tours during that time, some of my best moments were when I just trusted that I’d be ok on my own and went out into the great unknown. It was when I was in the hands of my guides, that I was truly guided.

Comments are always welcome.


Trusting Guidance

July 26, 2018

Ever get a funny feeling in your stomach and realize that a little voice residing there is telling you something?  It’s becoming well known how the stomach has a second brain with lots of emotional intelligence. But the point of my story is that I get my own inner guidance in many ways, one of which may be discomfort in the stomach.

Over the weekend, I had dinner with a dance friend. Our plan was to enjoy dinner and the jazz group that was playing at the Vietnamese-French restaurant nearby, then we would drive to a local dance venue. It would take about 30 minutes to drive over. Normally, this would be a routine trip, nothing to be concerned about except on this evening there had been reports that heavy rain was due to fall. I tried to tell myself that a bit of rain was nothing to fear; that said, I kept remembering the terrible rain that I drove through back in January when a truck tire exploded and like a missile sent the remains crashing into my car causing me whiplash and $2,000 damage to my almost new car. Needless to say, it was upsetting and traumatizing. I had come out of it alive when such a crash could have killed me. Hence, there was trepidation over driving in heavy rain.

My friend was insistent that I go out with him and to help alleviate my concerns he offered to drive me and then take me home later since we’d met up for the dinner as dance friends often do. I reluctantly agreed. So off we went under an umbrella with me thinking, “Well, it’s not raining hard now. Perhaps we’ll get there before the downpour”. We were only about a mile from my home, and the local plaza where we’d eaten, when I felt a really strange feeling in my chest and stomach. I don’t normally have such pains. I told myself that it was only a 30 minute drive and that I would be ok. I assumed it was just a bit of fear after having had the accident back in January; leftover trauma, so to speak.

alarmAs we approached the highway entrance, an alarm on my cell phone caused me to say, “Stop and pull over”. I knew the sound of that siren type of alarm. It was used to indicate an emergency situation. In this case it was the NWS warning people to get off the road due to the impending dangerous weather, heavy rain and possible flooding. My reaction was immediate. I said, “No! I’m not going.” And we turned around and my friend drove the short distance back to my house.

Now one might ask,”Was it a coincidence that the alarm came in just before we got on the highway when it would be more difficult to turn around and go home?” We were only one mile away, so returning was easy. And my friend certainly understood at this point so no harm done in any case. I got inside the house and was totally grateful to be safe, then settled into the rest of the evening in front of the TV with my cat Skylar. I was never so happy to be in my PJs!

I do believe that my angels were watching over me. That when I needed them, guidance helped me with an outward signal that staying in was the right thing to do. The next day I saw on the local internet about all the down trees, accidents, cars that got stuck in water, people that had to be rescued from their cars, etc. it wasn’t a joke, nor a figment of my imagination. There had been real danger and I had been warned. I am truly blessed. Comments and observations are welcome.


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