Judas crossed Rainbow Bridge

February 1, 2012

ImageYesterday at 2:10 p.m. EST my gorgeous red tabby Judas crossed over the bridge to meet her brother Hercules (4/5/2011). Judas had the same chronic renal failure indications that Hercules died of, but what actually took her down was oral cancer. When I couldn’t stop the bleeding in her mouth, I knew it was time to take her in. God was with me as my pet sitter had come over to say good-bye and so could run and get me some cloths to wipe her mouth. My guy friend, who normally doesn’t come over on Tuesdays, decided it was a better day and showed up exactly when I needed him to take me to the VET for the 2pm appt I was able to get just minutes after all this occurred. Everything fell into place once the decision was made. Thus, as I was crying hysterically, I knew I was being guided to do the right thing.

 Prior to this point, I was concerned that I might take even one precious day from Judas. How could I cut the life of such a beautiful creature by even one day if she was meant to have it. But it wasn’t in my hands. When a capillary broke in her diseased lower gum, the blood was pouring out. I carried her into the Vet in my arms with blood all over my shoulder where she had tried to bury her face. Up until the end, she looked to me for comfort, something she’d done since she was a kitten all the years ago.

 Both Hercules and Judas were found in my backyard the summer of 1994. He was named for coming to me first, being the brave one and she was named for being sneaky, grabbing the food I put out and then running away. I loved them both dearly, but each had different personalities. Judas, being a female was subservient to Hercules until her passed. She’s now had about 10 months to be the top cat, independent and stubborn until the end. She refused to allow me to do the fluid IV so I put Normysol solution in wet food 4 times a day. Then a few days ago, she started to refuse the doctored food (also with many supplements to try to overcome the cancer). So, I yielded to her will and gave her the plain wet food. She still barely ate.

 Yet, yesterday morning, she got up a bit brighter, had her pain medication, and ate more than usual. But the second meal at noon was fatal when a capillary broke and blood poured out. I had to take my beautiful girl in. She died in my arms with me telling her what a wonderful girl she had been, and how she couldn’t have been loved any more. I knew her soul had left when I saw her body lying there.

 I took her home to show my new rescue cat Skylar, whom I got in October. He hadn’t bonded with her yet and so seemed unimpressed. I haven’t noticed any change in him but I wanted to do this any way. Then I took Judas in a little box, with the help of a friend, down to be cremated. I will pick her up on Friday and hold a ceremony for her. Her ashes will be buried next to her brother so they can play forever at Rainbow Bridge. Already Hercules is telling me that she is there and not to worry about her. Still my heart is breaking for my beautiful girl.


Admitting Defeat – Well, Almost

October 19, 2011

In my last blog article I wrote about how I asked God to send me a pet and one showed up. I fully believe that the right thing is the one that works out. Sometimes the whole picture isn’t known at the time or there’s more to the story. Here’s what happened.

The Divine Plan was at work

Yes, I let my pet sitter know that I was ready to welcome a fur pal for my 17 year old Judas who lost her brother to chronic renal failure in April (six months ago). And, yes, this cat rescuer had a beautiful tortoise shell female that I fell in love with. Well, I loved the exterior package and, as we know we can’t always judge a book – or a cat- by its cover. As it turned out, this cat was very pretty, but it had a mean disposition.  Although I kept it in a separate room for a week as I was instructed to do and I went into this room daily to play with it, I didn’t feel like we were bonding. Sure, the cat would come to me when I opened the door to get petted and for some treats, but that’s just because it was alone and wanted company. But after a few minutes, it had had enough and would whip its head around and slap me with the paw.

We don’t always know the whole picture

I kept telling myself that this was normal for a cat that had been on the street for awhile and had to get used to kind treatment. Then when she bite me I drew the line. Meanwhile, Judas knew the cat was in the house and didn’t like it at all. Judas was screaming day and night. The combination of her reaction and my experience made me come to the conclusion that this wasn’t the right animal to adopt. I had to back out of the agreement. Luckily, the cat rescuer told me that sometimes it just doesn’t work out. Whew!

But the right thing was happening

I really felt bad about the whole thing. I had started to get invested in this beautiful cat. I gave her a new name – Athena; bought a gorgeous crystal collar and name tag, as well as some new toys. Everything was salvageable except the name tag, a small price to pay for what would have been a very bad situation if left to continue.

I checked in with guidance and realized that the whole experience with this cat happened for several reasons. (1) I learned that I had to give affection on this animal’s terms and not mine. Ok. (2) The cat rescuer was going through some tough times and we had the opportunity to talk. As a result of this interaction, she decided to come see me as a client. This was good for her as well as for me. So, in the end, the right thing had worked out for all concerned.

 

 


God, Please send me a pet!

September 28, 2011

 It’s been five months since my fur baby Hercules crossed over to Rainbow Bridge. Both his sister Judas and I miss him terribly. Sometimes she stands at the front door, which has a glass center pane, looking out and just cries wondering when he will return home. I come down the stairs and try to explain to her that I miss him too but that he isn’t coming home.  “Let’s welcome another fur baby who doesn’t have a home into our lives. It will help us heal while, at the same time, help a lost creature find a new home.”

I had helped my friend find a new pet two years ago by searching on the internet on animal rescue sites using the criteria he gave me. After several weeks, I found a two-year old male Virginia hound that was stated to be friendly to cats (after all there was his beloved Sherman to consider). So he went to the pet fair and met his soon to be Shelby, short for General George Shelby.

How can a pet find me?

This time, I wanted a pet to find me. When my Hercules and Judas were babies, they turned up at my house, then in a more spacious neighborhood allowing for the possibility of wild cats leaving their young. So, my guys found me and how lucky they were to find such a welcoming Mom! I wondered if such a thing could happen around a townhouse in a more compacted area; most probably not.

Help is close by

I told my pet sitter that I was ready (or thought so) for a new fur baby. She loved Hercules after caring for him for 12 of his 17 years and also understood my at trepidation about bringing a new pet into the house with his sister being an older animal like Judas.

Then she said, “One of my petsitters rescues cats and she has a new one available. I replied, “That’s great, but I’ve decided that I want a tortoise shell after seeing some young ones around the lake on my walk”. There’s a woman with 12 cats and some are tortoise shell or tortis, but she won’t part with any of them.

A new fur baby finds me

To my surprise, my pet sitter says, Her new rescue is a tortoise!” Wow! The writing was on the wall. I knew immediately that this cat was coming to me. The timing and the situation seemed to be falling perfecting into my lap so to speak. I felt that the universe was guiding me to this particular animal. I asked for the contact details and called the woman, Cathy and things just fell into place from there. I was able to visit the cat and found out what I needed to know. The torti was a female, about five years old, had just gotten her shots and appeared quite healthy. She was playful and seemed friendly to me. I immediately agreed to adopt her. Due to her golden markings between her eyes, I named her Athena, after the Goddess of Wisdom. (The sixth energy center is just between the eyes and signifies the energy of wisdom and psychic understanding).

My new fur baby

Athena would soon be mine after a very careful adoption process. More in my next posting.


The Importance of Helping Hands (Reaching the Top Of Machu Pichu)

July 15, 2011

Peru was an amazing trip for lots of reasons. First, I had wanted to go for years but was concerned about the altitude, the local conditions (how poor the country is with the resultant possibility of crime), and pre-conceptions about my physical limitations. The website played down the amount of walking and the fact that the one mile treks were up, up, up! Granted I had been doing walks around the lake near where I live, but 45-minute casual strolls don’t compare to climbing knee-high steps at Machu Pichu for an hour to reach the top summit in time for a sunrise ceremony! So in addition to strenuous hiking on the edge of a mountain, we were doing it before day-break in dim light. On June 20, the day before the June Solstice, I made it to the top fairly well. It was a spectacular sunrise.

Climbing Machu Pichu, Peru
Machu Pichu at sunrise

But once we had done some ceremony to welcome the sun, gone back down part way to use the bathroom facilities and then gone back up again, my legs were really starting to hurt. By the afternoon, my thighs were almost paralyzed with pain making each step more and more difficult. Then, to my pleasant surprise, I began to see hands in front of my face as my much younger fellow travelers began to turn around to lend a helping hand. With each step, as I struggled to move upward, I suddenly started to feel that I was aided by divine helpers, some present and some not visible. Spirits now uplifted, my steps were lightened as I felt that I not only had physical help but angelic help as well. A smile spread on my face. Positive self talk replaced the menacing thoughts of, “What if I can’t make it, how will I ever get back down alone?” Now my mind was filled with, “Yes, I can do this, with a little help from my friends.”


Guided to Leave My Car

February 18, 2011

Sometimes we are guided to do things and know why and other times we are led and aren’t sure what it’s all about… until later. The bigger picture may escape us. Here’s a story where the “why” is up for question.

Recently, we took a trip to Western Maryland to enjoy an activity that was on my bucket list. All my adult life, I’ve wanted to ride in a real husky dog sled, and I finally got the chance. Last fall, I came across an article in my local town magazine about a woman who owned a Siberian husky and how she volunteered to support the Iditarod race in Alaska. The article provided resources for interested people to learn more about the sport of husky racing as well as for those wishing to actually ride in a husky dog sled. I was surprised to learn that one such organization was within a three-hour drive from my home in Northern Virginia. Wow! I didn’t have to go to Alaska. (I did try to take a sled ride while travelling in Switzerland, but when we arrived at the top of the mountain, we were informed that the temperature was too warm for the dogs to run!) The date finally came and we were off, prepared to hit a bad snow storm sometime during the three days of our trip, (one day to drive up, a day to take the sled ride and do a bit of skiing and then a day to drive back).

Paying attention to guidance

After about an hour and a half of driving my slightly aging 2002 Volvo, I turned off the cruise control as we came upon some traffic and I wanted to have more driving maneuverability. Unfortunately, the car continued to respond as if it was still controlled by the cruise capability. I put my foot gently on the brake and the car slowed down, but when I used the accelerator, the car stopped at 60 mph, the speed at which I had set the cruise feature previously. This became frightening since I wasn’t sure how the car would respond to my actions, particularly in light of the normally delicately sensitive reaction to which I was accustomed. I told my travelling company of the situation and he kept asking me questions to which I answered, “The car isn’t responding. It’s like it has a mind of its own!” I felt that I had to pull off the highway to figure out what was going on, so I took the next exit, and pulled over at a nearby fast food restaurant. I turned off the car engine hoping to reset the cruise control, but it didn’t have the desired effect. When I returned to the highway, the car was still not under normal functioning.

This time, I was even more afraid. I knew that we had two more hours to drive to reach our destination. What to do? Again, I told my companion that I had to pull off the road. I took the very next exit, which was Hagerstown, a rather old railroad town. Immediately as I left the main road, there were two car dealerships, one with a service center and an associated car rental company. Pulling into the Toyota Center, I entered the service area and commenced to explain what was happening. Rhonda, one of the technicians, in trying to help me, provided instructions to pull my car into one of the service docks right away even though other people were waiting in the outer area. Rhonda couldn’t have been nicer. Toyota diagnostics aren’t much use on a Volvo so she started to work with my service manual and even called the nearest Volvo dealer (about 25 minutes behind us), but to no avail. Finally, my travelling companion and I decided to leave my car and book a rental car to continue on to our destination. We knew that about 10” of snow was predicted the next day and that driving in a bad storm with a car acting questionably would not be advisable. So off we went with the rental car, knowing that my “baby” would be safe in the hands of the Toyota Service Center’s parking lot and Rhonda’s watchful eye.

The rest of our drive up to the Western Maryland resort area of WISP went very smoothly now that I no longer was concerned about our mode of transportation. I could relax and leave the driving in the capable hands of my travelling companion as he’d taken over once we switched cars. Relaxing is something that I need to do more of and now I could get comfortable. We reached the resort in late afternoon, checked in, and surveyed the grounds. It was snowing lightly and rather chilly with the temperature hovering around 30 degrees. For the rest of Tuesday, we enjoyed our brief respite which included making plans for rental skis and a lift ticket for each of us for the next day after our husky dog sled ride. While we had time, we were fitted with skis, books and poles and put our rental equipment in the lockers provided by the resort for use by the guests. It was all very convenient. We also enjoyed dinner in the restaurant and watched the evening skiers on the slopes while wondering from where all their energy materialized.

The Ride of my life

The next morning, I jumped out of bed quite excitedly, prepared for the ride of my life. We were early to the Husky Power Dog Sled location as it was snowing quite heavily and we could hardly see to drive. Luckily, we only had a few miles to travel. Upon arrival, I realized how cold my hands and feet had become but I just had to be tough. After all, I was about to do something that was on my bucket list – a line item that I wanted to do before I died! And it was fast approaching. First, we heard the dogs barking in anticipation of the opportunity to pull a sled. These Alaskan husky dogs just live to pull and in addition, they love the cold weather. Today they would be very happy as it was cold enough for them and they would get to pull on an 11-dog sled team first for my friend and then for me. How fun!

Our husky ride was amazing; nothing short of spectacular, as we curved through the woods over fresh powder snow. I normally don’t like cold weather, but I braved a snow storm and for me, very cold weather to do this ride and loved every minute of it. My husky dog sled ride was all I’d hoped for and more.

Husky Power Dog Sled Ride

Afterwards, we drove again through a snowstorm to get back to the resort just in time to make a few ski runs down the beginner slope. It was quite funny how I was a bit scared to take the lift and the operator stopped it in order to allow me to get on. I felt like the whole trip was planned just for me! Ok, so I’ve slowed down over the years. I can’t do the heavyweight slopes anymore, but that’s ok, I still got down the hill without getting hurt and it was fun.

Back inside the Resort we heard people in the hallway saying they were going to drive home in what was by now a terrible snowstorm. We were so glad that we had decided to stay over an extra day during our trip planning so were not concerned about driving in such bad weather. Later, we heard the horror stories of people being stuck in their cars for upwards of 10 hours on highways around Washington, DC. But fortunately, we were not among them.

 Instead, we left Thursday morning with a clear sky and smooth sailing all the way back to the Toyota Dealer to pick up my car. There was Rhonda, on duty. We were grateful for her support and attempts to help. As a thank-you to her, I offered a copy of my inspirational memoir, The Circle of Life – A Journey through Grief to Understanding, asking, “Are you spiritual?” She replied, “Yes, my son has had issues since birth and we almost lost him a few times.” Rhonda thanked me for the autographed copy of my book which she assured me she would read.

After having a quick lunch and saying good-bye, we quickly moved all of our things from the rental car back to my car and continued on our way. At this point, I figured I would have to drive slowly, keeping my car below the speed where the cruise control had been set previously. But, to my surprise, the speed of the car inched up normally. I told my companion, “The car appears to be driving normally. How is that possible?”

Understanding comes

Then it hit me. We were supposed to stop at the Toyota Dealers. What’s the probability that my car would act up, then I would decide to pull off the road exactly in front of a location where a woman had a son that might die any time? I believe I was supposed to give her my book as there is information in it regarding life after death that will be reassuring for her. I only hope that she understands that death is not the end and that it is possible to communicate with loved ones after they cross the veil of death. I was guided to leave my car. The universe, once again, provided a perfect plan for all concerned.