Overcoming Negative Energies

May 6, 2015

Energy

Life would be so easy if we only had to deal with ourselves since it would eliminate not being able to get along with another. But by definition, this cancels out being in relationships, which are one reason that we are in the earth plane. So, no dice! Unless we are hermits, we must deal with other individuals outside of ourselves and in the process learn from them. If we are fortunate, we can overcome the negative energy we encounter buried within these challenges/lessons and open more to the light in the process. So how does this process of overcoming negative energies work?

If we take a look at nature, we can get some clues at how beings are supposed to be together normally. I use the word “normal” to mean when conditions are good, ok, or even average. Take my cat for example. If I’m nice to my cat by providing food, shelter, and morning kisses, he gives me love back; in fact, even if I put nasty medicine in his mouth, since he trusts me, he allows me to do this and still loves me back. Just to show that he has a real personality, if I don’t sit with him at night and watch TV together (which he really enjoys), he won’t come upstairs to sleep on the bed with me (which I really miss). Somehow he knows this. So when I don’t do something that he wants me to do, he doesn’t give me what I want in return. He’s a loving creature and expects love back just like I do. So he’s not stupid. If I ignore him, he will go in the other room and put his back towards me ignoring me. He’s even gone so far as to leave poopy by my bed to indicate that he’s really mad at me. I’m sure you can figure out what this translates to in human language! Anyone that has a pet is probably laughing in agreement with me right now, and for those of you that can hardly believe what I’m writing… well guess you have to be there.

So what’s the take-a-way? If an animal responds to love with love, then why don’t people do the same? The answer is that possibly it’s because we’re more complicated, but it shouldn’t be that way. It should just work like Newton postulated – each action has an equal but opposite reaction – if I love you then you should love me back. Well, why not? Why are people so full of anger, hate, commitment phobias, past hurts and unwillingness to be loved in the first place? It’s really a shame that we can love, nurture, care about, help, be present for others and then not get anywhere near this type of reaction in return.

According to Kabbalah and the more spiritual traditions, the reason that we do not receive love when we give love, is there is some challenge or lesson to learn. That is, there is a negative energy to overcome. In continuing to love even in the face of this negativity, we are maintaining our standing in the light and so furthering our own soul development. We are also helping to heal the person with the negative energy at a soul level. This is not easy to do; that said, once we feel that we have to get out for our own safety, then we are freed from any further obligation to do so, since our own welfare always comes first. In the end, each soul must be allowed to move forward in their own way, and in their own time. We can only hope that their negative energy can be overcome so that they can also move into the light. And so it is!


Changing the Unfamiliar into an Adventure

October 14, 2014

Doing something familiar seems easy. When we try something for the first time, particularly when aspects are totally new to us, it may seem more difficult. Keeping an open mind allows our creative and intuitive right brain to help us adapt to the situation. If all goes well, we can change what was first strange into an interesting experience. Or, it may even become an adventure! A few weeks ago the new subway line opened in my neighborhood. This simple event has been much a waited for the past several years to provide more efficient access to the Washington DC metropolitan area. So when it finally opened, I decided to try it out. Not having travelled by subway for quite awhile, I wasn’t familiar with the program of how to go about getting a ticket, finding the correct platform and determining the appropriate fare. So taking the subway on this day was to be an adventure! subwayFirst I drove into the main facility and easily found the parking garage; however, determining the actual level on which to Park took some intuitive figuring. Who knew just parking could be so complicated! Once parked, I got out of my car to see another woman doing exactly the same thing – arriving at the same time and appeared to be just as lost as I was. I called out to her asking if she was familiar with how to find the platform or buy a ticket. She replied that it was her first time there and she didn’t know either. A fellow adventurer had just arrived! So I walked up to her and said, “together we can figure this out”. She seemed pleased to have someone with whom to navigate this unfamiliar territory. After making introductions, we walked off together as if we we’re old friends chatting away as we motioned to each other as to how to first take the elevator up to the correct level, walk across the pedestrian bridge, and then over to the main metro area to buy tickets. The system had changed since my last Metro experience and so she was helpful to me in how to use the more sophisticated and to me, ominus farecard machines. After helping me to procure a ticket, my new friend and I headed for the correct platform. I soon felt like a pro since as we were at the end of the line, this station merely had 2 platforms to “go” or “come back” from Downtown! I smiled to myself as I became more comfortable with the whole experience.  Once the train arrived, we boarded sitting next to each other and began the 45 minute ride into the city. I enjoyed her company as we shared life stories while the train hummed along, the chatting serving to make the travel time go much faster than if I’d gone alone. Her stop came up first and we said good bye, both having had a new adventure while doing something quite ordinary. But isn’t life like that? We can either avoid doing things that are unfamiliar or we can embrace life looking for what we can experience that’s new or different; or learn or perhaps meet some one that can add to our lives. In short, we can turn the unfamiliar into an adventure!


Forgiveness is a blessing in disguise

May 12, 2014

No one on this earth is perfect. If we were perfect, we wouldn’t be here since our purpose is to learn our lessons to improve ourselves. Once we achieve perfection, our work is done. Our lessons are learned and the only reason for us to stay in this earthly realm is to continue to help others. Thus very few of us are perfected souls and still here! One of our earthly lessons is to learn to love completely and in so doing, we also learn to forgive those that aren’t so nice to us. This is a very old lesson; one that comes down through the ages. We keep working at it because it’s not an easy lesson; yet, once we learn it or perhaps have moments when we accomplish it, we realize the blessings that we get in return.

Let’s take a look at the lesson of forgiveness and how it can be a blessing in disguise. Perhaps someone has hurt us in a way that at the time seems most painful to us; a natural reaction is to turn away from that person in anger; to not want to see the individual who has caused us so much pain again; and/or to not wish to speak with the person that has hurt us in the future. In other words, we want to cut off all access to/from anyone or anything that hurts us. This is a self-protective mechanism. In a way, it is a natural way for us to protect ourselves from being hurt again. That said, when we cut ourselves off, we close down to others who may offer us something. Fear and love cannot be operating at the same time. When we have shut down due to fear of being hurt, we are not allowing love to come in either. Thus, although we are trying to protect ourselves, we are also doing ourselves a great dis-service. Perhaps this seems counter-intuitive but this is how our lessons work. To understand more, we must peel a layer of our ego away.

Rather than cutting ourselves off from those that hurt us we must find a way to forgive them for in so doing we release the negative energy that flows between us two and creates a more positive flow. The negative energy is the fear, and the positive energy is the love. Letting go of the fear of being hurt long enough to forgive is allowing love to move in and take over. Forgiveness is part of the reason we came to this earthly realm. If it were easy, it wouldn’t take so long.

ImageSo, the next time someone hurts you in some way: says something mean, doesn’t understand you, makes you wait too long, hurts your feelings, or a myriad of many other things that make you upset, think about the negative energy that you can create between you or take a moment to let go and say… “I have an opportunity to forgive and remain in the positive flow and stay in the love energy”. Doing so is being God-like and this is the reason we came to earth. And when you forgive, the blessing you have is to open to become a channel of love in return.

May you always remain in the light.

 

 


Why be nice?

August 7, 2013

I just had the most unpleasant experience dealing with a buyer on EBay. I’ve been buying on EBay for several years now but have only recently started selling. I decided to clean out my closets and thus make room for new things and in so doing, found opportunities to offer my gently used things to others. I am only selling the nicest of the things that I can do without, while the other no longer needed ones will be given to various charity bins. My philosophy is to be as honest as possible showing any marks, scraps or signs of wear and in some cases, make the decision not to even sell an item if there is any serious usage. Thus, the items I’m selling are in very good to excellent condition. So the stage is set.

P1040029I decided to sell a pair of beautiful red leather and suede shearling-lined boots for a fraction of their original cost. After several tries, a woman from one of the northern states bid and won the auction. I was happy to see the email notification of the sale come in. Then I waited for the payment. In my excitement, I prepared the package, being careful to include a packing slip and even buying the postage. Oh my, I realized that I was doing all this and she hadn’t paid yet so I waited until the morning. Surely, she’d pay by then. I sent an invoice according to what I learned from the EBay selling tutorial. No response. A couple days went by and still no response from her and no payment.

I began to check her feedback ratings and there were several negative ratings over the last year. In addition, I found that several people had not paid for her things as she had an EBay store herself. Wow, it hit me. Could it be possible that she just wanted to give me a hard time because she was frustrated that others had done the same to her? How nasty can one be? Doesn’t she know about the Law of Attraction? What one does sends out energy and attracts the same into their own lives. By being nasty, she was attracting buyers that were nasty. Now I understood. She liked being paid on-time but didn’t get it that it wasn’t ok to not pay others on time. “Pay me on time, but I can do what I want to you”. What thinking!

So I had to open an unpaid item case. Several days went by. I wondered what would happen. Luckily, the money for the boots was inconsequential to my lifestyle or to me paying my bills. It just hurt me that someone would be so nasty when I go out of my way to do the right thing for others. I had to void the postage and just wait.

After just short of a week, I received a notice that the case was being closed because she finally paid for the item. Apparently, she really wanted the boots, didn’t want the bad mark that an unpaid item would eventually mar her EBay record, but I still don’t know what she’ll do once she gets the boots. I have a 14 day money back policy in effect on this item. I’m convinced that she was “playing me”. What a shame. I only sent her an invoice and no nasty grams. I hope that this is the end of the story for the universe will take care of her; there is nothing else for me to do. She will bring her own reprisal. It’s such a shame really. Meanwhile, I redid the postage, took the package to the post office to make sure I had proper tracking and now I wait. We’ll see how it goes from here. Let’s all put positive energy on it! Meanwhile, be nice since the energy of being nice will come back to you!


Sometimes Community Finds Us

March 25, 2013

There are times to be alone and times to be with others and we all have our tolerances of both ends of this spectrum of need to be or not to be with others. That said, being social has been shown to be a necessary part of a healthy lifestyle and those that are part of a social network, e.g. community tend to live longer. OK  so much for the technicalities of the thought. If you are divorced and lose your network in the process as I did, finding a new one at middle age can be a challenge. And, if your family lives on the other side of the country or retires and moves away, the situation can be even more challenging.

FriendsThus establishing community is something that one must go after. Like many things, unless you work in a place where you can make friends that you see outside of work, and thus have a built in community, you have to consciously want to open yourself up to the opportunity to engage. As I’ve just mentioned, the workplace is one environment conducive for establishing relationships but it can be fraught with difficulties if “friends” becomes more than just friends. But that’s a different discussion.

Another good environment is one’s place of worship or natural locations of social interchange such as church, synagogue groups, or local Meetups.

A couple weeks ago I decided to attend a gathering at a local church even though I’m not Christian. The program included a potluck dinner, time for social interchange but also focused on seeing a movie about wild horses followed by a discussion session.  I found the location easily and joined a table that wasn’t yet full. As it turned out, the group at this particular table was mostly from Peru, Bolivia and Columbia as well as a few regulars from the U.S. Having been to Peru, I had some small talk to offer to the conversation although I did feel a little awkward not knowing anyone. They were, however, very welcoming and did their best to be inclusive. I found their attitude quite impressive. Perhaps I shouldn’t have been so surprised, after all, it was a church group and by its very nature, their perspective is to offer “love” to all. It was a nice experience for me after having gone to some other more secular groups that were more catty where I felt left out. Age, background, etc. weren’t important to these people. It was quite refreshing.

Then I had a really big surprise. When one said her birthday was coming up on March 25, I said that it was my birthday also! Next, one of the ladies said they (those that knew each other) were planning to gather at a local restaurant to celebrate the birthday and I was invited. I was overwhelmed! I barely knew these people and here they were inviting me to a party!

Well, true to form, I got a call a few days later from Rosie inviting me to a gathering on Sat. March 23 at 6:30 pm. The timing was good since I was attending an ARE Program on Soul Growth at the Unity Church which was finished at 4:30. By the time I left the program and ran a few errands I was able to go to the restaurant right on time and meet the group for dinner. All in all there were 14 people with 3 birthday people including myself. I came to learn that this group tried to get together monthly and used birthdays as a way to do it. It was a lovely evening including having “Happy Birthday” sung to me both in English and in Spanish.

I wish I could say that my own family did as much for me when I went to visit the week before. Yes, we did go out to dinner once while I was there but it lasted an hour (family drama was involved). So without dwelling on the details, I’ll just say that the old adage that we can’t pick our families (unless you’re talking at the soul level) but we can pick our friends certainly applies. And in this situation, community certainly found me!


Tune on and Tune In

October 15, 2012

A couple nights ago, I was speaking to the woman that hosts the monthly local dance in my neighborhood who also sells dance shoes. I was speaking to her about the shoes, indicating how lovely they were, even though I wasn’t in a position to buy them. For the first few sentences, she was polite and then, suddenly, she just turned off. There was no polite phrase indicating that she’d given me her “ok my time is clocked in already at five minutes so now I have to move on”, just a shift of the head and on to the next person. My reaction was of total shock. Sure, she wanted to make a sale; but, it was a public dance and selling shoes was not the whole point of the program. For me, social interchange while getting some exercise was the real reason for attending that evening. As I read energy quite well, what I felt as this was occurring was like a door slamming in my face. I was in mid-sentence when she turned her head so it seemed like my words had been cut with a knife. Wow, quite a reaction.

The next night I attended another dance in a different part of town. This time the host was celebrating one of the regular’s special birthdays. Since I knew this person, I went over to tell her how great she looked and to wish her well. Again, this woman gave me a couple of minutes and then, without warning, she turned her head and started talking to another person. Déjà vu. It had happened again.

Now I’m really good with getting my messages so here was a similar situation happening to me on two consecutive nights. In both cases, I was looking for polite conversation otherwise known as social interchange. What indicator was I not reading from these people? It was obvious that they were not interested in continuing conversations with me, thus this behavior signals that these people are not my friend. Ok, I can deal with that. I don’t have to be friends with everyone. However, where have manners gone? Alright, perhaps I’m too sensitive. Did I merely overstep boundaries? Would a sentence or two have been enough, so that by the third sentence, they had tuned me out?

Well, now I realize that I’m over-analyzing. The fault isn’t mine at all; sort of. I’m picking the wrong people to try to have a conversation with. It’s all about the energy. Not just the energy of the situation but the energy of soul development.

Let’s look deeper at what’s going on here. In both cases, I went into the scenarios with the best of intentions just wanting to be pleasant and to enjoy myself. In both cases I was totally snubbed. When we interact with those of lower vibration, it doesn’t go well since there is nothing with which to relate. That’s what was happening here. Both of these people just don’t care. They may seem to, but it’s not in there soul development to be concerned about anyone that’s not on their priority list. And that day, it wasn’t me.

However, I stop and try to help people when they come to me, no matter who they are. And, if I need to step away, I will offer some polite accolade, “Excuse me, I need to …..” or “I don’t mean to be rude, but I have to talk to ….. before they leave”. If people are not polite, it’s because their soul development is just not where we are, pure and simple.

So, no more analysis and just consider the source. Turn on your intuitive capabilities and tune into your inner light. The answers of how to behave will always be there.

Meanwhile, excuse me, I need to go fix dinner.


It’s Either Fear or Love

September 21, 2012

If you’ve been following my writings perhaps you remember me saying that “fear and love” cannot be active at the same time. But this is a topic that deserves repeating. Let’s start off with a definition:

What does it mean, “It’s either fear or love?”

Fear is active from our second energy center which is also where our drivers of sex, power, and money originate. It is also where anxiety as well as illness begins. Love, on the other hand, comes from the heart, the fourth energy center. Only when the heart is open can we be in a loving, caring, nurturing state. When fear is operating, the heart is closed and so not open to the positive energy that is possible.

 Why are we in fear?

When we are afraid that we’re not good enough, we shut out possibility. Being afraid only causes the energy of fear to multiply and come back in the way of chaos to harm us. How can this be the case?

Let’s say that you decide to start a business but are afraid you won’t be successful. The next thing you know events start happening that take up your time, while preventing you from moving forward with your vision. Thus, your fear has a self-fulfilling prophetic impact on your life.

Now let’s change the attitude to one of belief in yourself. By sending out positive thoughts such as I can do this or I deserve this because I’m a good person; I know my field and I am capable (all essentially coming from a love perspective, you set up the energy of positive events to come back to you. The next thing you know, opportunities are presented that allow you to fulfill your vision and you are successful.

Another example is with relationships: We may not be going out thinking, “Why bother, I won’t meet anyone anyway?” This is fear taking over when really the attitude is one of I’m not good enough.  The playing out is much like the above scenario. We don’t go out, there’s no opportunity to meet any new people, and thus the self-fulfilling prophesy takes over. If we change the attitude to, “I’ll go out and just have fun; while I’m out perhaps I’ll meet someone”, this positive outlook is inviting and will most likely attract new opportunities. And so it goes.

Why not try recognizing the fear for what it is, the shadow self, attempting to hold us back from moving forward with new opportunity. Let go of the fear and open space for love to enter your life.


We need more Lightworkers

August 20, 2012

Recognizing the need for Lightworker Community Kabbalah teaches that when there’s chaos, we’re not allowing enough light to come in. Thus, when I started to have lots of issues with a new computer, new cell phone, new bathroom renovation… I stood back and asked myself was this a message that I wasn’t allowing enough light to come in? Sure, I was creating posts of hope and inspiration to over 5,000 people on my Facebook page, as well as operating my intuitive life coaching business, but apparently it wasn’t enough. At least I believe that the underlying reason for this sudden “chaos” in my life was that the universe was making use of the time that I wasn’t utilizing to the proper spiritual level based on my soul’s purpose. Wow, what a job!

Spiritual community is always a good thing I feel it’s crucial to go back to basics from the spiritual perspective, which is why I started a new group called the NOVA Lightworkers (www.meetupsdc.com/NOVALightworkers/  – or was pushed by the forces of nature. In this sense, a Lightworker is one who uses their inner light of knowledge and wisdom in service to self and others. Our inner light connects us to our divine source, which is also of “the light” as opposed to the “darkness”. Not only do I feel a need to reach out to other spiritual souls on their life path desiring to be of service to others, I felt that there is a need to create a group in my local area. Sure there are plenty of “spiritual groups” but each leader comes from a different perspective and so will draw individuals with whom they resonate. Thus, with my personal focus of intuition development and energetic philosophy, those that stay in my group will resonate with me. The students will always find the right teacher for them. Those that are already teachers will find compatriates.

We are never tasked with more than we can handle. Thus, I accepted this divine “assignment” even wondering from where the time would come, knowing that somehow it would all happen. I set up the Lightworker group on “Meetup”, paid the fee and said quiely, “if this is what I’m meant to do, it will be successful”. Of course, I would know soon enough if it wasn’t. I didn’t even have to think twice. Within two days of the site going live, spiritual souls thirsty for a community began to sign up. Once the initial challenge of writing the text and planning how the format would be, I began to feel energized. Perhaps the universe was guided me back on track to do something I was supposed to do. Although planning two events per month initially seemed daunting, I now feel that I will be guided to know what to do and it will all work out… exactly as it should. Maybe all the confusion was a message that I was getting stuck in my left brain with details and being human, needed a reminder to let go, and trust my guidance. What a surprise! The teacher never fails to continue learning the same lessons…


How to Drive Customers Away

May 30, 2012

Anyone who has ever been in a sales, service business or even had client customers knows the importance of “customer service”. So why is it so hard to find quality service when interacting with people representing a company these days? Here are some possible reasons:

People are underpaid. They don’t get paid enough to deal with the issues at hand, so when they get irritated by the already irate customer, this individual hangs up. Nice way to handle the problem, right? Of course, wrong. But it’s happened a lot to me lately. This type of behavior only infuriates me more since I have to call in again only to wait in queue.

People just don’t care. They are underutilized in the job they are in. Perhaps their real profession was a higher skilled one and they are doing customer service merely to pay the bills. Their heart isn’t into it. Another version of this comes from improperly trained people. The result is that the customer gets treated poorly.

People aren’t skilled enough for the job. When I recently bought a new computer, I had to deal with a myriad of technicians who were supposed to know more than I did (should have been really easy with my level of computer savvy) only to find that they couldn’t help me solve the issues at hand. Mind you, it was a brand new computer so it should not have had so many issues. That’s another side of the problem. For now we are looking at the issue of trying to get service. I called and called only to find the person I was talking to had no clue about the particular software problem that the company I had bought it from (third party sale) sent me. I finally had to send the software back and use manual transfer of my data from my old system to the new one after I got hold of one technician who knew what he was doing. I was on-line with this guy from 9:30 pm until 3AM. It took that long to set up a new computer that I was told wouldn’t be a problem. Again, not the real issue here, but a tag along one. Sales over sells and service has to take the ball from there. I guess service is thrown some curve balls, but people should be properly trained. I also want to add that I had paid for upgraded priority service for three years on both hardware and software.

The company’s operational rules and policies are broken. I’ve just completed a 10-year line of credit with one of the huge banking/mortgage firms. After 8 of the 10 years on the program, I decided to actually use it to buy a heating and a/c system rather than take money from my investments due to the large sticker price. After all, the whole idea of the line of credit is so that the payments can be made over time, the interest rate is very low (3.25%) and the interest is tax- deductible as part of my mortgage. That’s the concept anyway. I barely got started with the loan only to find out that I had to pay the full money back within two years since the LOC was ending. Ok, so I had to make large payments which I figured I could do over my bank’s bill pay system. I was surprised to find that these ACH payments were converted to physical checks (part of this company’s policy requirements) and went into the mail. By the time the company actually got my $14,000 payment now in the form of a check, 6 weeks had gone by, I was nearly crazy making phone calls trying to track it down and I learned a lot about where the money could go along the way. I learned much more than I should have ever had to deal with. Every person I worked with gave me a run around until I finally drove over to a local branch and spoke to the branch manager who promptly helped me. After that, I physically went to the branch and made transactions. In this age of automation how bad can a system be that I can’t go online and make payments with full confidence. Just today I tried to resolve an issue with the final balance on this line of credit and again they drove me crazy until after the fourth try I got a woman who resolved my issue right away.

So in the end, if the first person doesn’t help you, hang up and call back. Eventually, you’ll get someone who knows what they are doing, is responsible, and actually cares. There are some good customer service people around. But you have to look hard to find them. Make a list and share it when you do.

 


A Tough Lesson to Learn

March 16, 2012

Someone close to me is enduring a very difficult life lesson, the spiritual context of which he’s not yet aware. From where I’m sitting, I see that his wife and daughter don’t pay much attention to him when he tries to communicate with them. I’m not sure if this is in response to his neglectful behavior or whether it was they who first neglected him. These situations tend to have long, winding and complicated histories with only the tentacles visible to those around the individuals of concern. The result is a very unhappy person who does his best to work hard to provide for all the luxuries that his very materialistic family has come to expect. Yes, this is a definite example of entitlement to the nth degree. So what’s the lesson?

Once a year I go for a visit and I was told that he would not be available during my stay of six days. At first I was rather irritated since I’d provided my itinerary over six months in advance. Then I realized that there must be something more serious going on since he told me when we spoke that, “I’ll be ok and not to worry”. When someone makes such statements one immediately begins to wonder what they shouldn’t be worried about. Just what is the problem? How serious is it that it can’t be simply stated? I really dislike secrecy since I think it causes more harm than good.

Here’s a bit more background. Let’s call this person Bob, which is a name change for privacy sake. Bob is a very highly-educated professional, running a business with multiple employees and has provided a high standard of living for his family. His wife and daughter have anything they could possibly want. I gave up worrying about what to buy them as gifts years ago since my offerings could never meet the standards of which they had come accustomed to so I just bought what I could afford and left it at that. It’s also important to note that I’ve never been jealous of what they had either, since I could never afford to buy the kind of clothes, cars, jewelry or other luxuries that they had, nor did I care about it. I’m happy with what’s within my reach and was also happy for them if it truly made them happy to have these things.

After actually leaving on my trip and arriving at my destination, I was surprised to find that Bob hadn’t gone wherever he was going…yet. We were able to share a couple meals together but without the mention of what was wrong or where he was going. I did notice, however, that during the lunch that his wife and daughter seemed a lot nicer to him. So what happened? Bob is aging and has come down with an illness. The old adage is that money can’t buy love, but the fear of dying can certainly change perspectives. Bob was ignored before and disrespected, but from where I was sitting, it sure looked like reality (as in he might not be around forever) set in.

So how does the life lesson work? Bob wasn’t getting his needs met. He was being nice to everyone around him. He has a wonderful nature, is of service to his community, yet, went home to an emotional shell. When he got sick, it was a wakeup call to his family. I certainly hope that he gets well and that everyone realizes that money does buy things, but that’s all they are, just things. People and what they bring to our lives are much more important. We all should value what we have before it’s too late.

I hope both Bob and his family learn the lesson of being less material and more spiritual. The universe has a way of pulling us back into balance… sometimes kicking and screaming. Sometimes it’s a tough lesson but one that we all need to learn at some point in our lives.